Tuesday, March 11, 2014

Words, Words, Words....

I am an intelligent creature...I swear by my beloved Frenchie, who farts, that I can add, subtract, email at break neck speed and read a book a week, simply for kicks. Moderately intelligent. I will give myself that...moderately. I feel good about that level, not too generous, but not underestimating the value of what a four year degree earns you....even when I delay that process and take 7 years to finish that degree...I WAS UNDECIDED ON MY MAJOR...ok?

Recently, I have come across the philosophical and over thinkers of our time. I can sit in a room with them and nod my head along with their discussion, interject an "I see" or "well, makes sense." When in all reality, I don't see, I don't even hear...I'm lost on what the meaning of the last 30 syllables that left your mouth were and I'm inconspicuously looking for the damned thesaurus you must be hiding somewhere.

It's when I realize that these fops, these narcissists of their own verbology, have never been called out on how perverse and moronic that they actually sound. And I'm pretty safe at assuming not a single idea that left their mottled brain was actually original....being that they seem to spout many quotes and references and use those bunny ear quotes a lot. I like bunnies. Really do, especially rabid ones.

The crowd that basks in the glow of the overly worded, is too embarrassed that they can't follow, they can't comprehend, they can't truly remember what the discussion is actually about, but could really use some hallucinogenic drugs at this point to watch the speaker's head melt...cause it would simply be more entertaining and remarkable.

God these people bore me and they do it while gleefully believing themselves to be the most interesting creatures on the planet. Hit head on wall, hit head on wall, hit head on wall.

So I've come to the point of where I plan to stand up for my people, the majority, us. The American population has an average intelligence and reading level of third graders. You know why? Cause we have to work, pay bills, we don't desperately cling to what we learned in British Literature or high school Calculus...cause you know why???? We have things to do and more valuable, lovely things to think upon and we are secure in that indulgence. I, myself, vow to claim ignorance, admit my lack of time spent studying the dictionary while instead I enjoyed the real world (complete with rabid bunnies).

Because if these philosophers actually cared to get their point across. If their main goal was to impress a major point and belief upon the world at large concerning religion, politics or perhaps the sexual practices of the Haitian peoples, as their legacy, then they would surely want to be understood. Instead, it seems that they merely want to hear their magnificent brains pouring from their tea stained lips (cause these people spend hell-of-time sipping hot teas at the local Sbucks). And each superior syllable that eeks past their gaping holes for mouths, challenges me to dare NOT to understand.

Well, I don't...dammit I don't. And I'm not sure I would really care about the topic if I did understand the words spewing from their mouth.

So...to these plunderers of the English language .. the time wasters of life ... the soulless who claim to have souls...the unoriginal who claim to be the MOST unique people ever (what a common statement).... I say to you ....

You are better than a Xanax. You are less exciting than an annual obgyn exam. A speculum has more personality and depth of character than you. You make me want to rip your face off and feed it to my lovely rabid bunnies whose sheer existence is a larger mark on society than your own.

And to you who actually listen to this drivel and revel in it, you are just as vapid. Go get a life. Find the philosophy of existing and maybe, just maybe, you will create your own life epiphany…and I swear when you do, the best and grandest of life's discoveries comes in the words of children, the colors from a crayon box and humbling experiences of the common man.